There is much I could say about the shadowy parts that live within each of us. My healing passport has many stamps from the shadowlands – or the ‘dark pit’ as I sometimes call it. I learned so much while traversing the untamed wilderness of my inner landscape and uncovered many deep truths about my life’s hardships.

The further I explored the shadows, the more my inner light was revealed, and I discovered that many parts of who I was were hiding within and behind the darkness – feeding me lies about who I was and my place in the world. I HAD to face those shadow parts, because they had no idea who I am today. I had to teach them, and I still teach them. I consciously choose over and over again to live from the truth of my Soul and not the lies of my Shadow.

Getting to know the unconscious parts of yourself requires digging deep. Sometimes that digging can be emotionally painful, but there is a reward hiding within Shadow Work…

Light. Truth. The you-est you.

With that said, this overview will explore the powerful role of Shadow Work in the healing process.

What is your Shadow Self?

The Shadow Self represents the parts of us that are hardest to acknowledge and reconcile – the parts we hide out of fear of rejection. Much like a psychological blind spot, the Shadow is the part of the psyche that your ego (or the egoic ideal) doesn’t want to acknowledge, and so the ego resists it – suppressing it deep within the recesses of the unconscious mind.

Misunderstood, wounded, and discarded, the Shadow Self simmers on the edge of consciousness whispering lies like, “I’m unworthy, I’m broken, I’m not good enough, I’ve done ___ and feel shame about it, or I don’t deserve ___.” Because arguing and reconciling with this voice can be so painful, many default to putting on the mask of “I’m fine” in effort to cope.

The Shadow’s lies represent unconscious beliefs developed or picked up somehow somewhere along life’s journey, but they are certainly not accurate depictions of who we truly are. Sadly, the Shadow Self believes every cruel thing it whispers. Lies are all the Shadow Self knows until it experiences the light of truth.

Now… What exactly IS Shadow Work?

Shadow Work is the process of making the unconscious conscious by exposing our inner darkness to the light of our highest truth. It is a deeply healing process, because you develop true awareness of your WHOLE self and compassionately reconcile with that which is no longer serving you. Shadow Work is an ongoing process and not a one-and-done process you can knock out in a single therapy session or an hour journaling.

Shadow Work is extremely personal and may look different for everyone, but there are four key checkpoints every Shadow Worker experiences.

1.) Awareness of your Shadow

Shadow Work begins when you acknowledge that you have a Shadow – a darker side of you that needs loving work

2.) Identifying your Shadow’s voice

Shadow Work deepens when you identify the inner voice you’ve been listening to as that of your Shadow Self.

3.) Meeting your Shadow

There are many ways to directly engage your Shadow, such as through journaling, internal conversations, guided meditations, and sometimes even through dreams.

4.) Integrating your Shadow

(Also described as Befriending your Shadow) – Your Shadow is running off old information. They don’t know you have released old patterns of thoughts and behaviors that are no longer serving you until you update them and invite them to transform and heal with you.

What happens when you avoid Shadow Work?

If Shadow Work is avoided or overlooked, then you further suppress your Shadow deeper into your unconscious, which leads to many concerns, namely:

Poor mental, emotional, and psychological health – Emotionally flooded reactions, anxiety, unhealed trauma, low self-esteem, and other symptoms of mental illness may be common.

Poor relational health – Unacknowledged traits get projected onto others and/or may be triggered by traits in others we unconsciously recognize in ourselves.

Self-sabotage / self-deceit – The lies your Shadow tells you will be believed.

Signs you’re ready for Shadow Work

If you’re wondering how to know you’re ready for Shadow Work, here are some common signs:

· You’ve been wearing an “I’m fine” mask.

· You feel fragmented, as if some part of you won’t let you rest.

· You feel like ‘the truth’ is eating you alive.

· You don’t feel like you’re living authentically.

· You feel ‘undesirable’ or ‘unacceptable.’

What are the benefits of Shadow Work?

There are countless benefits, but the primary benefit to Shadow Work is that it allows you to be fully seen and known. As you re-educate and heal your wounded self, your inner light of truth will ripple out into every realm of your life – your relationship with yourself, your past, others, and even your higher self. There is wisdom hiding in those dark places, and it is only by facing the darkness that we find healing, our inner light, and our deepest most authentic truth.

Integrating your Shadow isn’t easy – but it’s worth it.

Shadow work is challenging, and it is normal for there to be a growing-pain period or a messy middle time as we start showing up differently in our lives. The goal of Shadow Work is not complete transformation or total acceptance, but rather, integration – wholeness rather than perfection. We continuously uncover parts of our Shadow as we move through life. These 'hidden' parts are shown to us only when they feel safe to make themselves known – which starts with creating safety within ourselves and deepening our connection to our higher, healthy Adult Self.

Shadow Work is a deep dive that can feel messy and vulnerable as these hidden parts are unveiled. It may feel like your Shadow is ripping the rug out from under you, but Shadow Work is the tool that clears away the beliefs that no longer serve us so we can return to our solid foundation of authenticity and truth. It is from THIS place that we can live fully integrated lives from the truth of who we are, rather than from the fragmented whispers of the Shadow.

Let’s Connect

Hi there! I’m Jenny, a licensed therapist and Certified Adult Chair® Master Coach.

Hi there! I’m Jenny, a licensed Holistic Therapist (LISW-CP) and Certified Adult Chair Master Coach. I combine both therapy and coaching methodologies to provide my clients with a holistic perspective and the techniques they need to flourish. Rediscovering who you were always meant to be is an act of courage, and radical self-love can turn unconscious paralysis into conscious, authentic growth. Learn more about me here.

A beginner's guide to Shadow Work: How to heal the wounded self